Count Binface teases new mayoral campaign as he prepares for ‘Bindependence Day’ UK tour.

Earl Binface, the two-time London mayoral candidate who beat the likes of Britain First and Laurence Fox at the polls (the latter, he says, was a “TKO” after the Reclaim Party leader failed to fill in a form correctly) he clearly cares about people, and we can’t help but wonder if that’s a key part of his appeal as a political figure – that, and more simply, he’s a man with a dustbin on his head.

His agent has not given me his name and wants to know it. When I note that he’s probably the most important individual between the two of us, he quickly interjects, “Not one bit, and I’m not just saying this because I need human votes—not at all, not at all. – I am interested in every human being. Every life form I encounter in the omniverse is of equal importance.”

And 24,000 human beings – specifically, Londoners – were interested in him in 2021, putting the Earl (real name Jon Harvey) as their first choice in that year’s mayoral election. He brings this up as we discuss proportional representation, a topic that seems to have united both left and right, with both the Green Party and Nigel Farage’s UK Reform calling for electoral reform.

“What did they do after (the 2021 vote),” he asks me via Zoom, his background changing to the familiar green benches of the House of Commons. “The b*****s in this building here, where I’m cowering, very secretly changed the voting system, without asking the British people. So why can you have an AV (alternative vote) referendum in 2011 but then in 2021 or whatever, it just slips through a change?

“Did he stop people? No, no, because how many votes did we get in this year’s mayoral election? 24,000. Take that, you political bastards, I’ll beat any system.”

And after standing against Boris Johnson, Britain First, Laurence Fox and even Rishi Sunak (in his seat of Richmond and Northallerton at last month’s general election, coming sixth behind the five main political parties with 308 votes), Who Is Binface Targeting Next?

“Well, I mean, in the most immediate term, I think old Trumpy Trump, don’t you think? At least to the Democrats, they gave old Joe the job,” he explains. “He dresses like he made a wonderful decision for democracy when he had to be dragged out of the Oval Office, but still, he’s way better than Trump, and I’m sure Kamala will. good.”

Indeed, when President Biden wrote on July 21 that he was withdrawing as the Democratic candidate for the November election because “it is in the best interest of my party and the country,” Binface’s message to Democrats was clear: “I am prepared. . Let’s do it.”

As for his policy proposals for the electorate across the pond, he wants to ban convicted felons from being president, pay for pretzels at a dollar (a nod to his croissant-based political equivalent in Britain), nationalize Taylor Swift (joining Adele on his nationalization list). ) and allows Elon Musk to conquer the moon as long as he “promises to stay there”.

He also wants “Secret Service officers to be allowed to climb on sloped roofs” — a reference to the US agency’s director, Kimberley Cheatle, telling ABC News there was a “safety factor that would be taken into account” then when it comes to putting “someone up on a sloping roof”.

A little closer to home – well, for us at least, given that Binface hails from Sigma IX – the earl gave a rather frank and swearing opinion to the seven Tory MPs who are said to have asked the Chair of the Committee from 1922, Bob Blackman, nomination papers to take part in the election for the leadership of the Conservative Party.

Sky News says politicians believed to have registered an interest are former home secretaries James Cleverly, Suella Braverman and Priti Patel; former Work and Pensions Secretary Mel Stride; former business secretary Kemi Badenoch; former immigration minister Robert Jenrick and former security minister Tom Tugendhat.

“Shit,” Binface says simply. “I mean, it’s not exactly The Magnificent Seven, is it? I’ll put it mildly: whoever wins that leadership contest will at worst be the next Iain Duncan Smith and at best the next Michael Howard. I would say the chances of either of them winning the general election are zero.”

Our conversation comes a day after Tugendhat, considered by many to be a more “centrist” candidate compared to Badenoch and Braverman, said he would be willing to leave the European Convention on Human Rights (ECHR) – and join Russia and Belarus as non-signatories – if no longer “serving the interests of the British people”.

This is despite the Tonbridge MP taking a different stance on the issue while speaking to Times Radio in October.

“Now the people who said they want to leave the convention can understand the argument,” he explained to John Pienaar. “There are quite big questions being raised, whether it’s about the Good Friday Agreement, about the devolved administrations, about our relationships with other countries, including actually the TCA (Trade and Cooperation Agreement), the Windsor Agreement. with the European Union.”

As I ask the earl what he makes of the ECtHR debate, which continues to be a talking point for the Conservative Party, Binface starts making puppet gestures with his tightly gloved fingers.

“Yada, yada, yada, ‘let’s all try to outdo Farage.’ Blah, blah, blah,” he says dismissively. “No one cares. ECHR, the idea of ​​’oh, we don’t want to sign up for human rights’. Well, if that’s your politics, knock yourself out, guys.

“I’m an alien and I care about human rights more than them, and what does that say? I’m on Planet Zanussi and could use a little science. There’s a 1980s reference you won’t get.”

He guesses correctly.

Only Tugendhat, Cleverly and Jenrick have officially declared at the time of writing, with the final four candidates “making their case” to party members at the Conservative Party Conference in late September/early October.

At that time, Binface will be touring the UK with his Biindependence Day live show – a matchup he says is “pure coincidence”.

“It’s up to the audience to decide where the greatest comedy is,” he says. “I am in the lap of the mayor’s victory. I take my special brand of sci-fi satire, my own unique history of Britain, my diagnosis of Earth’s problems and more. Lots of stories from Sigma IX, my yard and the rest. You can expect all kinds of fun and games.

However, he downplays talk of a political rally. “There’s no rally as such because health and safety won’t let me drive inside the building, which is a great shame, but other than that it’s everything a comedian could want, from the biggest politician of Earth.”

With 16 locations all signed up to be visited by the ‘space politician’ in September and October He’s talking nonsense The podcast host (who wants Greta Thunberg, Andy Murray, Adele and Brian Blessed on his show – the latter so they can “keep Gordon healthy and alive”) is looking forward to visiting places he hasn’t yet the chance to make them see.

“I want to see Bath. I’ve heard great things about the spring (water),” he tells me. “Not that I could drink, very frustrating being a Recyclon, but I don’t have straw holes in the old basket. So the spring water sounds lovely but I can’t even taste the bloody stuff but I’m still excited and of course the wonder that is Croydon. You can’t get any better than Fairfield Halls, Croydon.

“From what I understand, it’s the biggest supplier in the whole omniverse apart from the Sigma IX Leisure Center and I’m really excited to be coming to Croydon, which makes me really excited.”

Seems like an opportunity to scout locations at the same time. “Exactly right,” confirmed the count. “Doubling with A-grade satire means I’m doing a little reconversion across the nation to see where you’d like a bit of Binface, because there’s all these mayors now, aren’t they? All these subway mayors, or whatever. Everyone must have a mayor – even Croydon has one! Unbelievable.

“So I said, ‘Well, if the people want a mayor, maybe…’ Because, you know, there’s not going to be a general election for a while, so I like a bit of local democracy, so we’ll see. “

Earl Binface for Mayor of Croydon? “You said it, mate,” he replies. “You could be my campaign secretary, but I will say this: do you know how much the London Mayoral deposit is? 10 grand, right?

“To run for mayor of Croydon, it’s five thousand. What a hoot! Unbelievable. So if I funded this, would people want me? would it? They would fund that, I’m not so sure. So, you know, it all depends.”

To refer to what he said to me when I timidly tried to get down, to that, Binface, I say: not a bit.

Croydon, let’s make it happen.

More information about Count Binface’s Biindependence Day the tour can be found on his website.

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