She left two children at home to travel alone with her middle son to Greece

I think about how little time we have left under one roof as a family – especially since we’ve already hit the single digits for the number of cousins ​​we have left before my brood leaves the nest.

It seems my social algorithms have latched onto this sentiment as well, because I keep seeing stories that draw attention to the notion that, on average, by the time kids turn 18, they’ve already spent about 90% of their time with their parents. . The remaining 10% is spread over the decades until their parents pass. I haven’t been able to find the origin of this hypothesis, but it rings true to me.

Compared to childhood, where our children spend most of their lives at home with their families, once they grow up, move out, and start their own families and eventful lives, their parents are left with only vestiges of time.

My husband and I rarely catch up with our own parents

We see my husband’s family about twice a month as they live nearby. However, my family and I only travel to see them once every two or three years since we live several states away. When my kids were young, we used to take road trips from Chicago to Montana, a 1,400-mile drive that took 21 hours.

The thing is, we did everything we could to visit my parents, with three young children back, but as the years went by and our lives got fuller (and more expensive), we saw them less and less. .

Now, as a professional travel writer, one of the perks of the job is that I accumulate miles and loyalty points, which I can redeem for trips around the globe. We travel often as a family, all five of us, and these adventures have brought us an incredible amount of joy and connection.

When we’re home, though, my teenagers spread out and do their own thing. From working hours to afterschool clubs to hanging out with friends to too much screen time, sometimes it feels like I barely see my loved ones. But when we’re out somewhere, anywhere, they’re all mine.

A one-on-one vacation with my middle child

In June, I took my middle son to Greece on an adventure just for the two of us. While I do my best to get alone time with each of my kids when we’re at home—my youngest son and I play chess, my middle son walks with me, and my oldest and I will walk the dogs—sometimes routines and obligations just get in the way and it’s difficult to find meaningful time to connect without the distraction of other siblings and the hustle and bustle of our household.

Taking a puppy out of the wild pack and taking him on a great adventure allows us to bond while the other two pups strengthen their relationships at home and with their father. Traveling with a child at a time it allows me to see it as it is, share and learn without any intrusion. I do this with each of my sons, but this time it was with my middle son return

Our journey began in Rafina, a port city near Athens. We walked on the pebble beach, visited the Agios Nikolas Chapel, enjoyed a wonderful dinner and then went on a week long trip to the islands of Paros, Naxos and Santorini.

I loved hiking along Santorini’s volcanic caldera from Fira to Oia, a six-mile trail full of volcanic soil, pumice, and lava. The sparkling views of the Aegean sea contrasted with the rugged rugged terrain, whitewashed architecture and blue-domed churches were a highlight for me.

My brown-haired, beryl-eyed son loved walking from our small family-owned and operated lodge to Fira Port, careful not to get run over by the dozens of industrious mules following the same path.

We played slap jack cards and did little sketches of each other while we waited for dinner. We walked the winding cobbled paths of the small villages so my son could find the perfect yellow necklace for his girlfriend.

On our evening walks, we silently marveled at the sunset. Every time our walking guide said “never, never” when describing Greek customs, we giggled – now, it’s something we tell each other as our own inner thread.

These trips taught me who my sons are

I am grateful to have built a career that allows me to travel with each of my sons. I got to know them as unique individuals apart from their siblings.

What I’ve learned over the years of doing this with my boys, though, is that it’s critical to look at everyday events not as chores or inconveniences, but as opportunities to click. Trips to the grocery store or runs around the neighborhood with my significant other can be just as meaningful and impactful as our longer fun times abroad, and probably more sustainable for our relationship as it grows.

While I loved mugging for photos in Greece with my smart and bold guy, making time while at home will continue to be a priority for me, even when he becomes independent and flies.