I received a $250,000 inheritance and I regret how I spent it

When I came into a large sum of money in 2021, I wasn’t sure what to do with it and I regret how I spent it.

I worked as a birth doula and did prenatal and postpartum massage

I became a lactation educator and then a lactation consultant, so I’ve been in the mother-baby realm for most of my professional life in Colorado. The pay wasn’t great, but my family helped me financially by paying my rent.

During this time, my father told me that I was in my grandmother’s will and that I would receive an inheritance. She died in November 2020.

When I inherited $250,000 in January 2021, I quickly realized I didn’t have a plan for the money

My grandparents were successful real estate investors in the San Francisco Bay Area in the 1970s. I inherited $75,000 from my grandmother’s will and $175,000 from her life insurance policy. My sister and my two cousins ​​all got the same amount of money.

I received the $175,000 as a lump sum and the $75,000 in multiple payments over the following months.

When my grandmother’s account manager transferred the $175,000 to my bank account, I realized that I was very afraid of money.

Seeing that was a relief since I didn’t have a lot of money back then, but it quickly turned into feelings that I wasn’t good enough or worthy and deserved to have money.

I hired a financial advisor and then ghosted her

I hired a financial advisor who offered a year-long program where we met twice a month to come up with a plan for the money we received. We would also talk about changing my career and creating career goals.

Even though I paid her $5,000 up front, I ghosted her because of my limiting beliefs about money and spent my inheritance pretty quickly. I wasn’t ready to deal with my emotional issues around money.

I decided I wanted out of Colorado because I was done with the snow. I put some stuff in storage, loaded up my Subaru Crosstrek with six months worth of stuff, and off I went.

I blew through the money living the life

I’m a champagne taste kind of girl on a beer budget. I took a trip to places I wanted to move to and spent most of my inheritance on that trip.

I had left my job and had no source of income – I was living off the inheritance money. I was in the Denver area for two weeks, then Colorado Springs for three weeks, and then Santa Fe, New Mexico for about three weeks before landing in Austin.

I spent a good chunk of my inheritance on Airbnbs, hotels, gas and food. Other items I purchased with my money were $5,000 worth of expensive medical equipment, a $2,000 silver diamond ring that I still own, and two fancy dinners in Santa Fe.

After this trip, I was ready to confront my feelings about money, so I contacted the same financial advisor

Looking back, I struggled because I never received a financial education. Money was tight for my family and I never had to pay for anything as a child.

I think it would have been important to have a money plan – that’s what I did wrong. I also wish I had been willing to face some of my complicated feelings about money—my shame and judgment.

Even though I ghosted her, I went back to the financial advisor about a year later. I had spent most of my money up to that point, but we met and she was understanding and compassionate. She agreed to work together since I had already paid the $5,000 upfront.

She helped me get back on my feet when I was in a terrible situation. I basically examined my financial situation and she gave me the steps I could take to overcome it. She also helped me brainstorm my career options and set a plan.

In January 2022 I had a come to Jesus moment – ​​I had to earn money. I got a job in aged care and started working side jobs.

It was a dramatic situation to receive a large amount of money and then be scared and not know what to do with it

The financial counselor helped me heal a lot of financial trauma and money blockages — I did a lot of healing work. I also improved my financial knowledge.

I rent an apartment in San Antonio and still raise my salary. I haven’t started investing or saving, but when I have extra money, I want to invest in Real Estate Investment Trusts.

I am passionate about my leadership work in the corporate world. I am in a better place and if I were to receive a large amount of money again, I would have the ability to hold onto it and use it wisely.

Want to share your story? Email Lauryn Haas at [email protected].