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How to deal with being interrupted, as observed by Kamala Harris

This essay as stated is based on a conversation with Selena Rezvania 46-year-old confidence expert and speaker based in Philadelphia. It has been edited for length and clarity.

Whether at a high-stakes board meeting or a lively networking event, it can be difficult to reclaim attention after being talked over or interrupted. Your inclination may be to avoid confrontation and internalize the message that your thought was not important.

As an executive speaker and workplace confidence expert, I’ve spent decades studying the best techniques to gain attention and communicate effectively. Vice President Kamala Harris is one of my strongest examples of someone who leads a room with equal parts strength and composure.

Harris first caught my attention with her masterful handling of interruptions from Mike Pence during the 2020 vice presidential debate. Since then, she has continued to be a powerful force on the campaign trail, using her skills to smooth out interruptions and maintain authority.

These are four lessons on how to succeed in being talked about that we can learn from Harris.

Sharp eye contact can force the breaker to recognize you

When she was interrupted by Mike Pence during the 2020 vice presidential debate, Harris turned her attention to Pence and made eye contact with him. She did not withdraw from the interaction or internalize his disruption; rather, her eye contact demonstrated authority, confidence, and control over the situation.

Making eye contact with someone who has snubbed you demands their attention and forces them to acknowledge you. Eye contact can also create a moment of discomfort for the other person, which can prompt them to stop talking or at least reconsider their behavior.

A body language warning can prevent someone from continuing to talk about you

Many people respond to interruption by physically shrinking or questioning themselves. However, Harris is strong when disturbed by using a clear, non-verbal signal that she is not done talking. Her call, a hand signal with a stop sign, is an expansive gesture that demonstrates that she will continue to claim her entire bubble of space in terms of body language and verbal communication.

I often advise people to keep talking when interrupted, but sometimes a calm but assertive gesture, such as a stop sign or index finger, can defuse an emotional situation and refocus the conversation.

You do not need permission to continue talking

Harris often responds to the interruption with a cold but firm statement: “I’m talking.” This short statement shows that he intends to finish his thought before allowing someone else to take over.

Instead of giving in to the other person by asking, “Can I finish, please,” she stays calm and stays focused on the message. It is important to note that you do not need to ask permission to continue talking when someone interrupts you.

The broken record technique is great for reasserting boundaries

One technique that works particularly well with assertive and domineering communicators is the “broken record technique,” which involves repeating your phrase, such as Harris’s “I’m talking,” until you regain control. Harris uses this strategic repetition to highlight how many times she has been interrupted or disrespected. This technique also reaffirms his limits and shows that he will not back down. Try using this technique with a coworker who can’t hear you or respect your boundaries the first time.

The bottom line

No matter who you are, you’re bound to come into contact with people who think they’re entitled to more space, attention, words, or time than you. The key we can learn from Harris is not to internalize that message and let it diminish your presence.

Stick to the core message you intend to share and don’t be afraid to claim space. And remember: These tips don’t need to be tested in a high-stakes board meeting. Try testing the waters in low-stakes work or social settings and build your confidence.

If you are an expert with useful tips that can be used in the workplace and would like to share your tips, email Tess Martinelli at [email protected].

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