Country star Thomas Rhett travels alone to be a better husband and father

Rhett and Akins first met as childhood friends in elementary school and married in 2012. The couple has since had four daughters, Willa Gray, Ada James, Lennon Love and Lillie Carolina, ages 2 and 8 years.

When Rhett’s career took off, their marriage counselor suggested that Akins, who had a nursing degree, tour with him for a year, Rhett told Vanity Fair. This affected their relationship and ability to balance parenting with work.

In a video posted in July by Christian organization I Am Second, Akins spoke about the couple’s struggles along the way.

“I started touring with my husband and I was running around ragged and just following him around, trying to make it feel like I used to,” Akins said. “I just hit a breaking point. I didn’t like him and I pissed him off,” she said.

Akins recalled a time when they had fought on the road. At that time they had two children. “I said, ‘I hate you. i hate you I feel lost and I hate that you put your career on the line and I hate the pressure it puts on us and I hate that I brought two little girls into this.”

Although Rhett brings his family on tour during summer vacation, he now often travels alone.

“Through a lot of talking to my wife and being really honest about it, it’s like, ‘Hey, when I go do this thing, I think I just have to go on my own so I can do it a million percent , so that when I come home, I feel like I’ve accomplished what I was supposed to do, and now I can really be a present husband and a present father,’” he said.

The benefits of spending time apart

Avigail Lev, a couples therapist in San Francisco, previously told Business Insider that having a life outside of your relationship can benefit your marriage.

“Couples often start sharing their minds, almost,” Lev said. “When people become too attached and codependent, it actually damages the relationship in many ways. It oozes passion, enthusiasm and respect.”

Ashley Archambault, mother and teacher who works with her husband, recently wrote to BI that she tries to spend as much time as possible away from him, noting that going away helps her not take him for granted.

“Also, when I’m single, I fill my own cup and rejuvenate myself so that I enter our relationship feeling whole rather than looking to my husband to complete me,” she wrote.

Spending time away from home can also help parents refresh.

Wendy Altschuler, writer and mother of three left her three children at home with her husband to celebrate her birthday alone on a Swiss mountain. She didn’t feel guilty or have to justify her choices.

“A physical reset helped me return home refreshed and appreciated,” she wrote.

A representative for Rhett did not immediately respond to a request for comment from BI sent outside regular business hours.