Meet the ‘yes mum’ from Croydon who never says no to her eight-year-old and ‘buys him everything he wants’

Meet the “yes mom” who “never says no” to her eight-year-old, buys her everything she wants and lets her make her own decisions. Lorna Simpson, 37, from Croydon, south London, believes children don’t need someone “constantly telling them what to do and telling them no”.

She has no rules because she believes that Skylah-Faith naturally “does the right thing”, doesn’t set a strict bedtime and allows her to learn at her own pace. Instead of denying her daughter Skylah-Faith’s requests, she asks her why she wants something and why she’s interested in it.

Lorna believes that a blanket refusal without explanation is “harsh” and instead opts for communication and understanding. A keen dancer, Lorna bought Skylah-Faith a pole dance and aerial hammock, as well as her own playset – because she asked for it. He even painted the front of his house pink for Skylah-Faith.

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She also allows Skylah-Faith to have her friends over for sleepovers whenever she likes. But Lorna says her relaxed approach is working, with Skylah-Faith rarely asking for things and being able to make “conscious” decisions about what she wants.

She says she made the decision to parent Skylah-Faith with a gentler approach after claiming she had a “strict, no-understanding” upbringing. Lorna, a part-time busker and home educator, said: “Kids get this experience once and they need to enjoy it.”

“As far as I know, I don’t have rules because Skylah-Faith does the right thing, so this is proof that I don’t need rules, as written in her essence. I might say yes to staying until 12 or one. in the morning, if she’s really not tired or wants to watch a movie or play online games more, I let her sleep more until her natural clock tells me so, but she usually wakes up early.”

Lorna said her relaxed approach stemmed from her own strict upbringing. “I had a very forced childhood – I wasn’t asked for my opinion and I don’t like doing that for my daughter. I had to unlearn and relearn things – it’s one of the reasons I took my daughter out of public. school and homeschooled,” she said.

Lorna allows Skylah-Faith to make her own decisions and encourages conversations. “Kids need understanding – they don’t need someone constantly telling them what to do. You let them grow. So we’ll be out, for example, and if my daughter wants something online or in the store and it makes sense and she’s really interested in it – then of course I’ll get it.”

“Lorna explained that Skylah ‘doesn’t ask for a lot’ because she ‘already has everything she needs or wants.’ “During Christmas shopping, she realizes that other people are buying things for the sake of things,” Lorna said.

Lorna says she has “no regrets” with Skylah’s upbringing and “just wants to cherish every moment”. Lorna tried to strike a balance in her parenting, allowing Skylah-Faith to experience things at her own pace.

She said: “There’s a lot of communication going on where I get to see how she feels about something – it’s a lot deeper than just saying no to things. I mainly go with who I am authentically.”

Lorna has some restrictions and has had to sometimes refuse some of Skylah-Faith’s requests, but for the most part she lets her have what she wants. She had to come to terms with Skylah’s interest in vaping, but researching together showed her the dangers.

She says Skylah “understands the reasoning.” Lorna likes to give Skylah-Faith free rein with her friends, but still says she’s protective of where she goes. “As far as sleeping – if she wants her best friend, then that’s fine, but I’m not letting her go anywhere else,” she said.

Lorna says her own strict upbringing stifled her confidence, so she wants things to be different for her daughter. She said: “We all have the capacity to flourish, we don’t need someone to tell us how to be. We don’t have to be taught to learn because many of the things you learn are through your own learning. interests or experience since birth, she’s been pretty advanced and I’m not going to stop that growth.”

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