I insisted on a prenup with my future husband because I make more

I had spent so much time building my business that I couldn’t imagine losing any of it in a divorce. I promised myself that when I met my future partner, we would sign a prenup before we got married.

Getting a prenup before marriage was a non-negotiable for me

After I met my fiance in 2018, we talked about prenups a few times before we got engaged. You hear stories about people being offended by the idea of ​​a prenup, but my fiance didn’t care at all. He is ambitious and works for his father’s plumbing business. It was very good for him.

I believe that contracts are essential in business and relationships. It might not sound romantic to compare love to business, but when you’re about to enter into a legal marriage with someone, I think it’s best to have a contract that spells out the worst case scenario.

Before working with a client, we sign a contract that protects us if something goes wrong. I would never do business with someone without this legal protection as it could lead to an expensive lawsuit. That’s why it also makes sense from a personal perspective.

I have more assets than my business and money in bank accounts

I often hear people say they don’t need a prenuptial agreement because they don’t have any assets other than cash or investment accounts. Not the case for me. With my money, I purchased assets such as a car and a 16-acre property.

While I’m excited to share my money and assets with my partner and plan to split our bills and expenses, I still want to protect my assets if something happens. The only way to do this legally is to have a detailed prenuptial agreement.

Furthermore, a prenup is not one-sided. It also protects my fiance and he can add what assets he wants to protect.

I spent a year working on the contractual agreement

My fiancé and I got engaged in November 2022 and set a wedding date for October 2024. Seven months after we got engaged, I suggested we start the prenup process.

First we audited all of our assets in and out of our bank accounts. For example, my fiance owns a truck, snowmobiles, and motorcycles. I have listed all its items and their values. Then we discussed how we would divide things if we broke up.

I decided that what’s mine is mine and what’s his is his. Anything we own together, like the house we own together, will be split 50-50. I did not agree to anything during this process.

My fiance decided not to hire his own lawyer

While I chose to hire an attorney, my fiance decided not to hire his. He felt that since we were on the same page, it didn’t make sense to pay for an attorney when he was willing to sign the contractual agreement that my attorney and I would draft.

This is allowed in Massachusetts; however, my attorney shared that if we were to divorce, the judge might rule more in his favor. I was okay with that risk.

I found a lawyer through a colleague’s recommendation. In the past year, we’ve had about five dates.

There was a lot of back and forth because our assets changed during that time. After each meeting, I would share with my fiance what my lawyer and I had talked about and added to the prenuptial draft. As of July 11, 2024, the contractual agreement is signed and legalized, making it final.

I paid around $5,000 for the prenuptial agreement, but I consider it an investment in my future

My fiance offered to share the prenuptial cost with me, but I felt it wasn’t fair for him to pay. Since I drafted the more favorable prenuptial agreement, I thought it only fair to bear the cost.

My little one cost around $5,000. It may seem like a lot, but I was happy to spend a little money now so I could save in the long run.

The trickiest part was finding the alimony

At first, I was determined not to give alimony, which is financial support that will allow your ex-husband to maintain the lifestyle he had while married to you. My attorney advised me that if a judge sees this in your contractual agreement, it may be considered unfair to the other party.

We decided to include alimony in the prenuptial agreement because I make about 40% more than my partner per year. My fiance and I have agreed on a tier system based on the number of years we’ve been together. For example, if we have been together for five years, there would be no alimony, but after 10 years, a certain percentage would be given, and so on.

Prenups aren’t just for rich people

There’s a stigma around getting a prenup that if you get one, it’s because you’re very rich. It’s not true, but at 27, no one I know has a prenup. I couldn’t turn to friends for advice, so I researched independently.

We are only a few weeks away from the wedding and now that the prenuptial agreement is signed, I feel like we can focus on what’s next for us. Eventually we want to have kids and buy more houses together. We have a strong relationship and are getting married knowing that we are on the same page now and will be in the future.

Want to share your story? Email Lauryn Haas at [email protected].