My husband inherited millions but never gave me a dime. If I divorce him, would I get anything out of it?

Dear Quentin,

I’m thinking about divorce. My husband inherited several million dollars from his father when he died. Am I entitled to any of this if I choose to divorce? I live in Texas. He doesn’t share his bank account information so I have no idea what I would be entitled to.

He forced me to take Social Security at 62. I am now 65 and have been collecting Social Security since 62 and a half. I claimed my benefits early because my husband never gave me money to put into my account.

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We also have five rental properties. Two of them were inherited, but the rent goes into a joint checking account. Would I still get half the rent each month if I filed for divorce? It’s time for a new beginning.

Wife in Texas

Related: “Sometimes the pain is unbearable”: My daughter cut me out of her life. Am I conflicted – do I exclude her from my will?

dear wife,

If you file joint tax returns, you may be able to

If the rental income from these properties was going into a joint account, you likely had considerable cash on hand. I suspect your reluctance to access that money ultimately led you to take Social Security at age 62. Sometimes the strings are invisible, and if you felt forced or coerced into retirement, you might have felt like you were living under your husband’s rules. Accessing these benefits gave you independence, even if it did so at a price.

If that’s the case, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you didn’t feel you had the same right to the community property as your husband. I’m sorry you lived a more modest lifestyle because your husband kept a tight – or controlling – grip on the purse strings. And most of all, I’m sorry that this has ruined your self-confidence and happiness over the years, and affected the way you feel about both your marriage and your place in the world.

That being said, you made a decision and hopefully it gave you the freedom and power to make other decisions, leading you to where you are now. If taking Social Security at 62, even if it meant getting smaller payments, helped you discover what you want at 65 for the rest of your life, it was worth it. Only you can decide, but financial control is a form of domestic abuse, and if you’ve raised your children and been a stay-at-home mom, it’s even more blatant.

To directly answer two of your financial and legal questions: No, you are not entitled to a share of your spouse’s inheritance if you divorce, unless that money went into a joint bank account and the funds were mixed. And rental income from separate property—that is, property your spouse acquired before your marriage—does not combine those properties. The money in the joint account belongs to both of you, so talk to a lawyer.

Claiming social insurance at age 62

You get 100% of your Social Security benefit at full retirement age, which is 67 for anyone born in 1960 or after, and you get a lower amount if you claim anytime between age 62 and retirement age fill. If you wait until you’re 70, you get about 8% more per year. Some advisers say it can work about the same whether you start taking benefits at 62 or 70 – it all depends on how long you live. You, however, had other, more immediate considerations.

The financial argument suggests that people should delay their Social Security benefits as long as possible, especially if they are healthy. Virtually all American workers between the ages of 45 and 62 should wait until age 65 to collect Social Security, according to this working paper by researchers at Boston University and the Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta. More than 90 percent of people should wait until age 70, but only 10.2 percent appear to be doing so, they said.

To put that into context for your retirement: claiming Social Security early reduces household discretionary spending by $182,370 for the median worker nearing retirement, the paper concluded. “The optimization would produce a 10.4 percent increase in typical worker lifetime expenditures,” the researchers wrote. “For one in four, lifetime spending gains exceed 17%. For one in 10, the gain exceeds 26%.”

Your situation is not unique. Nearly half of workers (47%) retire early, and many cite more serious reasons than yours, according to a report by the Employee Benefit Research Institute, a Washington-based nonprofit. Nearly a third cited a financial hardship, such as a health problem or disability unrelated to COVID-19, while nearly a quarter said they retired because of changes at their company. About 38% said they could afford to retire early.

Thank God for your new life, however you choose to pursue it.

More columns from Quentin Fottrell:

“We’re happily married mediocre gay men”: We’re 58, make $160,000, and have $2.2 million in savings. I grew up poor. Our families treat us like ATMs. are we ok

‘It’s the saddest thing’: I’m happily retired and my 60-year-old friends want to know how I did it. Should I tell them my secret?

I am a veteran, 53 years old, with 6 degrees and $245,000 in student debt. I plan to discharge my disability loans when I reach $1 million. Is this immoral?

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