“I’m a childless surrogate – I wanted to be pregnant without the ‘tie’ of a baby”

A childless woman chose to be a surrogate so that she could still experience pregnancy without having the “bond” of having a child. Kim Smith, 29, grew up with fond memories of surrogacy, as her mother Emma, ​​52, had six surrogate children.

She says she knew from the age of 14 that she didn’t want to be a mother – but was drawn to follow in her own mother’s footsteps. After making sure she wasn’t going to change her mind, the 24-year-old applied through British surrogacy agency COTS.

Kim, who is engaged to be married, has now been a surrogate for two couples and found the pregnancy “fascinating” and enjoyed creating a family for them. She gave birth to a boy last month to parents Chris and Tom, both 34, and says it has been “helpful to watch them become fathers”.

READ MORE: “My Vinted earrings arrived in vintage packaging – I felt violated”

Kim, who works for the railways in east London, said: “I wanted to help people. And on the selfish side – I wanted to experience pregnancy and not have the tie of having a baby at the end. I found pregnancy absolutely fascinating .”

Kim’s mother Emma, ​​a stay-at-home mother, decided to be a surrogate after she felt her family was complete and saw an ad for COTS on TV. Kim said: “She had really enjoyed the pregnancy.

“I have very beautiful memories of resting my head on my mother’s belly and feeling the baby move. Because I grew up with him, it was the most normal thing.”

Kim knew from her early teens that she wanted to be a surrogate. She said: “I wanted to carry babies for other people. I was also adamant that I didn’t want to have babies. I get the best job in the world. I get to be the fun auntie.”

Kim waited a few years to make sure it was something she wanted to do and applied in 2019. She said: “I knew it was the path for me.”

Kim chatted with a few couples before settling on her first set of intended parents. She said: “You have to make sure you’re on the same page. We had difficult conversations.”

Kim is a traditional surrogate and uses artificial insemination in the comfort of her own home. She fell pregnant in late 2020 after four months of trying – and met her fiancé Dilara, 27, who also works on the railways, when she was six months old.

She said: “It was a relief. We were close during the pregnancy. We talked regularly. They came to all the appointments. Seeing her face when she saw her baby move was unforgettable. We had some moments with really special.”

Dilara said: “I never thought much about surrogacy. I simply found it interesting”.

“I remember being quite excited about it. When he talked about future surrogates, I couldn’t wait to be part of them.”

Kim gave birth to a baby boy by emergency C-section in the spring of 2021 after a 24-hour labor. She said: “I heard his first cry. He was collected and taken to his parents. I have footage of the moment.”

Kim has seen the couple a few times before, but now says contact is minimal. He waited until November 2022 when he began looking for another couple to be a surrogate for.

Kim is set to marry Dilara in September 2024 and did not want to get pregnant for the wedding. This time she had more of a checklist of things she wanted in a couple.

Kim said: “I really wanted to wear for a gay couple. I met Chris and Tom and we chatted in the pub for four hours. I felt that spark. I wanted the relationship to last life.”

Kim became pregnant within a month in the summer of 2023 and had a “plain sailing” pregnancy. The four of them went to scans together and had dinners and sleepovers.

She said: “I moved in with Chris and Tom from 39 weeks pregnant.”

Kim had a home birth with Chris and Tom and labored for five hours before giving birth to her son in May 2024, weighing 8lbs 10oz. She said: “I gave birth on the couch in his dads arms. It was an incredible and powerful moment. It was wonderful to watch them become fathers.”

Kim says their little boy is now “fat” and “healthy” and she’s continued to see him a lot. She said: “We’ve all become a huge part of each other’s lives. I will also be an aunt to the child.”

Dilara said: “I loved it. To see this wonderful couple, to see them raise a family because of what Kim wants – it was fascinating. I have nothing but good words. It’s the ultimate display of love.”

“The whole thing was pretty effortless. She did a really good job with it. She’s very in tune with her body. I took pictures the whole time (during labor). I remember saying, ‘You’re doing great. happened’ It was quite a magical moment”.

“We’re pretty lucky with Chris and Tom. It feels effortless. It doesn’t feel like a chore. There like an extended family. It gives you hope for the next time.”

Kim hopes to be a surrogate again, but will wait at least a year before finding others to help. She said, “I’ll see how I go. But I want to continue surrogacy at least twice.”

Kim’s says that surrogacy is “not something that everyone could do” and says that anyone who considers it should not “rush into it”. She said: “You have to make sure you feel that spark. It’s very intimate.”

Kim documented her journey on Instagram and YouTube @thetravellingsurrogate

Now we bring you the latest updates on WhatsApp first